Leigh Kember, trainee outdoor instructor

“I want to give people the chance to experience nature’s healing qualities”

I have never felt more alone than the time I had to stand up at my dad’s funeral and read out a heartfelt poem.

This was in November 2019, after he had lost his short battle with a rare stomach cancer which took him away from me and my sister. Earlier in the year I also suffered the loss of my mum who fought cancer for 4 years and who I loved with all my heart. I miss them both dearly. 2019 was a year I will never forget and I will be healing the wounds for many more years to come.

My life at this point had taken a dramatic turn for the worst. I didn’t know how to feel, or how to act, or how I was going to just continue on living as normal. I became depressed, resentful and life was an emotional rollercoaster. I had lost my sense of purpose and felt as though I had nowhere to go. Work became too stressful and I found myself in a desperate hurry to regain my personal strength and belief that everything will be ok.

I was lucky that I already had a deep passion for the outdoors and in previous years used it as a way to connect with my inner self. Whether I’m walking over mountains, paddling down rivers or climbing crags I find I can lose myself in whatever activity I’m doing, and for a time I have some peace from all the negative thoughts. There is a unique relationship between the soul and nature that has healing qualities, and this is what I have reconnected with since November.

In January 2020 I had taken sabbatical leave from work and embarked on a journey to Snowdonia. This is where I started a 4-month outdoor instructors course and where I would be able to reconnect with the outdoors and rebuild my life. My intention is to gain more knowledge and experience to help others who may find themselves with mental ill health, or those who need a place to escape and find themselves again.

I finally found my inner calling and albeit with a few dark days of combatting the underlying depression and anxiety, I started to feel stronger and felt as though good things were happening. I had relit the candle that had been put out previously, and I now had something to work towards.

The course was unfortunately cut short due to the virus outbreak in late March, which was when my assessments were booked and where the country found themselves in uncharted territory. A very unsettling and frightening time for all, and if It wasn’t for the journey I had been on over the past few months it could have been a very bad place for me to be.

But thankfully I had built up resilience and had a pathway that I could focus on while being at home. I had to find other ways of connecting with my passion and straight away I started a course in First Aid for mental health and safeguarding, which has not only taught me ways of helping myself but most importantly how to help others through what can be very hard times.

It is with both the outdoor instructing and knowledge of mental health that I plan to persue a life of helping others connect with the outdoors and find other ways of healing wounds in ways that cannot be prescribed by a GP. I want to give people what I have been given and let everyone have a chance to experience nature’s healing qualities. I hope my story will show others who are going through hard times that there is a way to find themselves again and that we are not alone.

Follow Leigh’s mountain adventures on Facebook: @madetracks 

Leigh with his dad last summer

Training with in North Wales with the team from Plas y Brenin